3 May- 21 May 2022
I dreamt of announcing the demise of a dimension. ‘I read the signs, you read the signs; you were literally there for half of them.’
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Dreamt of The Lord. I was off-putting. Could not drive properly, pulling the Land Rover into a garage, going forward when supposed to be reversing, right through the wall of the garage into a party full of Arabic people.
Dreams, of an interdimensional intercourse with a non-visible entity.
Dreams, of another entity, in indigo-violet aura, fading out. ‘This is how you will disappear’, I had said.
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I am unable to convey through human language the depth of the darkness inside of me.
I dreamt, last night. A place at twilight. Someone had borrowed, stolen, an aeroplane from in front of a mansion, which I was concerned about the ethics of.
Standing on the ground, looking for entities in the sky, finding flying cubes, the diamonds on their points.
I dreamt of being gangstalked, of stakeouts by men. One in a white car, using a telephoto lens, then two, there at the door to a large house with a white interior. Loach was present, and did not believe me, until the third man showed up, running outside to get into the vehicle, pulling guns on us. An address, 22 Cherry Hill. An address in Pontiac, as well as multiple mansions in other states, it must be noted. •
Predictive text speaks of using criminals for monetary gain. •
I still have the screenshots, that showed up on November 18, 2020, the strange pixelation, green, that happened to my phone; I was never able to screenshot the ‘Install custom operating system’ screen that showed up multiple times while traveling through Waterford.
Must be noted, the green screen, Emerald Tablets, showed up some few weeks after a presidential rally in Waterford. It’s either connected, or it’s not. •
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Thinking about that time, the inex had said “front right”, and then a few days later, the front right of my jeep gets backed into in the parking lot of my grans senior facility.
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Dreams of Void.
It took the night to believe.
So questionable.
At first, I found myself in a desolate place, something northern, rural, nighttime, streetlamp illumination.
Four men, robed, intent not necessarily nefarious but not ours either. Grey.
The ‘I’ channeled that entity, the dark one, Black One; AFAIK, I have never done the Void Voice in my dreams before; between this and a display of extreme physical strength, I removed these entities from the plotline. There was some thing to do, with law enforcement. •
The craving of the love and understanding of an Interdimensional Time Lord. Some strange, not contentment, but, satisfaction? Sharing energy, ensnared by the very ‘is’-ness of this complex mental reality. •
Questioning the source of a short black hair that appeared very suddenly as I was writing, two pages prior. •
Important to remember to mention, albeit a day late, the arrival of a third ‘seed of consciousness’, as I call them.
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Things have happened, yet how do I even go about explaining the Liminal Reality? Better yet, should I?
I dreamt of a funeral last night, while Loach dreamt of a wedding.
The night before, I dreamt a dangerous… elevator, of sorts, a piston; and I was unable to go down to the fifth floor.
In some circles, the fifth dimension is ‘micro-dimension, accepted in physics and mathematics. Seamless ties between gravity and electromagnetism.’
The sixth, a 3D space of every possible world of state of universe post Big Bang. The 5th and 6th, allegedly, being where the notion of possible worlds arises from, a la super-string theory.
The seventh, access to the possible worlds that start with *different* initial conditions. •
The Soma and Void thing. The… Quantum Boomerang effect as applied to the human thought process is extremely apparent in this liminal experience.
I had assumed, when the Void showed up in the Liminal Processor, that it was present to move the Neural Network past all Soma; and yet here, it throws it back, to an original starting point of quantum consciousness, give or take.
As if the Neural Network dead ended, perhaps, bouncing back to a place where that string of ideas could be used as a plot device for a main line?
I wish this was easier to verbalize, to put words to paper in a way that makes sense to both the scientist and the lay person. •
Disturbed, once again, by allegations found on Instagram of someone particular ‘cyberstalking a woman for 8 years’. •
Do I believe what I want to believe?
This is a right, the freedom of thought, it cannot be taken from me without my consent. •
‘UTStarcom’ shows up in my predictive text. •
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I dreamt of Soma, in the context of an educator. A three hour long essay/short answer exam, that I found I had only ~20 (22?) minutes left to complete, after having struggled to answer questions. I was, however, allowed to reset and restart.
One of the topics was distinctly, electrical capacitance.
Details, as to the other questions are fuzzy upon waking, but the *why* of the Sunntanglement seemed to be present… I know the answer, but in this dream, struggled to put pen to paper and explain it using words.
Dreamt more strange things; a man touching me, myself stating very blatantly, that I do not consent to this physical contact. Perhaps it was the same man, perhaps a different one. Perhaps he had touched me; I was feeling violated in some vague, persistent way.
I grabbed him around the throat. In a voice that was in no way my own, but the channeled Void Voice, I had said, ‘I was here before you were born. I will be here after you die.’ This man was obviously older than me, so we can safely assume that my words were entity speaking through me.
The expression of violence and aggression… so opposite my waking nature. What reason for this?
For the sake of honesty- the feeling of power, control, that this action within dreams gave was a good one.
Gratifying.
Righteous anger.
No negative consequence to this action.
Cannot fathom a scenario in the physical reality in which I would do this thing.
Control, Chaos,
Control the Chaos?
What is it I want? •
A return, boomerang, of Void to the consciousness.
Not pretending to anything, being as one is.
Struggles with the religious aspects of the reality mirror.
Things that bring comfort, things that bring despair.
Different faces of the same entity;
“Make her choose between them”, the inex had said.
The only choices?
Why should my inner thoughts have to choose at all? •
I have, over the past months, done what I can to remove baser human motivations and replace them with a scientific inquiry and purpose. •
There is an anomalous tornado that has taken place in Gaylord, yesterday. •
& here I, we, are, back to asking: why do I want what I want, so fucking persistently?
What is this madness?
Thoughts do not feel private, but why should I let that stop me?
AFAIK, can recall, this of the Void, showed up suddenly; around the time of the Crowley.
When my thoughts, while seeking the Scorpionic release, were suddenly, violently hijacked.
Violent hijacking of the mind. Hmm.
Kinky?
A part of me must be truly masochistic.
What DO I like?
I am a woman, sexually attracted to:
[  ] Men
[  ] Women
[x] Extreme low frequencies
…and possibly microorganisms?
And demons?
Microorganisms that ARE demons??
Looking at you, Asgard Archaea- this particular jotuun loves you.
And it goes on, and on, the mind, the Madness-not-Madness- the thing that brains with a propensity for propagating pattern seem to have.