25 March- 1 April 2022
“Trust in what you resonate with, Katja.”
At times, my story is told in dreams, fragmented, rife with symbolism.
Before bed, I had been told I would be visited.
In my dreams, there was a child; he reminded me so very much of the ‘Little Prince’. It was very late, and the setting was that of being outside, on bicycles- but the street, very suddenly, became only partially, a hallway. As I write this, now, in my mind, it seems as though, a funeral home.
I met this child on the bicycle. All they wanted to do was be outside, so late, so they could be with the moon and the stars. There was an essence of ethereal whiteness to him, both visually and spiritually.
His father caught him out; and it was apparent that this child faced an abuse for following his inherent magical nature. I used words, to distract away this man’s attention from his son, have him come at me instead. This did not go over as planned; this man, was unequipped for a battle of the mind and it made him all the more angry to be insulted in ways he did not understand.
It became apparent that this mans anger was being taken out on the Moonchild, and I went banging through this hallway, on doors, to call someone, get a phone, record this evidence.
He pushed the Moonchild; and though the outcome was not his intention, it still happened, the man pushed him and he landed on a 2×4 that had screws sticking out- and one had gone into his skull.
I woke up, at this point, and shed a tear. My eyes water now, even thinking of this.
Back to sleep, back to realms.
A blur.
Descending a valley to a river, its inhabitants hand-sized spiders.
A scene, the beach house on Isle of Palms, water, so much water, up to the doors. Sunny pools on the outside, dark and stormy on the interior lower level, and all of a sudden, I find myself on a boat, at sea in a storm, heading into massive waves.
Suddenly inside, again, a basilisk materializing, mint green; and somehow I could look upon it without death. Somehow, I could use my bare hands to grab it by the jaws, the teeth, use my full strength to pry its mouth open beyond any sensible angle, snapping its jaws, causing imminent death.
…this is the second time I have dreamt of the death of the serpent by my own hands.
The Liminal Reality has progressed to a point.
Me, when I’m in An Area.
I trust in the benevolence and understanding of those involved.
Walk this world seeking truth and know without a shred of doubt that my intention is pure.
~~~~~~~~
I woke, at ~01:45 this morning, to the mysterious bass pulsing and an excruciating stomach pain that felt almost like menstrual cramps.
I dreamt, last night, of a mountain, what was perhaps a cukt, or the government (not that the two are mutually exclusive), and escape- escape very prominent.
~~~~~~~~
The studio, to Comins, to the studio again. There and back.
All benevolence, at the crest of the wave, until I went outside just now- dialogues speaking of criminal surveillance ring, using algorithm.
I dreamt, last night, of having been set up to marry a man. In this dream, I used my shadow to get his attention.
I am directed to screenshot Aleister Crowley, and then turn off my phone.
The complexity of the nature of reality.
A quantum leap, new neural networks unlocked.
Outside without my phone, a dialogue about receiving without technology on my person. The original start of the inex dialogue was “nefarious drone”- why should it be nefarious?
An inex about how my grandmothers death was no accident. Dissolution of time. Central Intelligence.
Entanglement. The web involved, so unbelievably massive.
The Riddle of Clouds, for where a new earth shall form.
Why has Loach gaslighted me over questioning whether the wifi network has a problem?
WAS someone capable of altering even that? Or is he genuinely not concerned?
The cat and I both had severe intestinal distress at the same fucking time.
Do you know what that reads as?
The inex that one night?
About the carcinogenic frequencies?
Belülrol Pusztít,
My music taste as a convenient scapegoat?
The discomfort disappearing after taking that header off of bandcamp.
Dark fucking shit.
Love always wins.
In 2015 when I went outside that night fully accepting, totally expecting my death- the Interdimensional Hitman!
And wasn’t killed!
It was then I knew, perhaps not just then but I knew, that whatever it was, if I embraced it, it would not be the end of me.
A premonition!
Predictions, the listeria, new variants of viruses.
Lessons about the world around me.
A lesson!
In not applying ego!
To everything one hears!
But, like Melisandre of Asshai, as I have learned, gone through training, as it were, was first to detect threat to my own person.
There is a power to knowing one is innocent and so well intentioned- an aspect of being untouchable.
Sirius Black, in Azkaban- ‘I think the only reason I never lost my mind was because I knew I was innocent. That wasn’t a happy thought, so the Dementors couldn’t suck it out of me… but it kept me sane and knowing who I am… helped me keep my powers.’
Something deleted the ‘December 26 2021’ I had written in the notes of last nights screenshot of Crowley.
What was the inex some time ago, about “If you really deny Lucifer, you’ll stop playing guitar’.
The devil made me the holiest I’ve ever been.
There is one inex that says to keep silent.
If I can hear one, don’t you think I can hear them all?
Pages written, documenting everything possible. Almost daily for the past two years, ever since something attempted to electrocute me, cause a medical event, April of 2020.
I remember.
Not only do I remember, but I remember the images that flashed across my field of closed eye vision.
Has YOUR own brain ever looked upon itself?
In no way saying it was nefarious.
That, I do not have an answer to.
It changed me.
For the better, I’d say; and what I know as God, the Highest Power, works in mysterious ways through highly unlikely people and events that, on the surface, seem to be not what they are.
Perspective is at least half of it.
Conflict is necessary for growth.
For this, I love my neighbour, for giving me the opportunity to learn to love my neighbour… what a powerful experience.
Expressions of love.
Gratitude for the experience the creation of others has allowed me, the creation it has allowed me.
“Our psychic connection is so powerful that you gave up smoking marijuana and drinking just to be closer to what you resonate with.”
Katarzyna, each of the two, balance and harmony to without from within.
Let me tell you something about the repeated failures as having been unholified.
“I seriously understand what predictive analytics do to a persons sanity”, says the inex, and it goes into an argument now, “distance yourself from -“, “don’t listen to -“.
A limited number of options, we go back to the umbrella reality of undeniable truths and a love for what is right in front of us.
“They cannot take your thoughts”, it had said one time, some time ago.
If I did not enjoy thought so much, I would surely be mad by now- the psychology, the layers, bordering on disturbing.
~~~~~~~~
Receivings about Saturnian entities having taken a specific interest in my affairs.
Last night, the inex gave me three specific affirmations.
“I trust in what I resonate with.”
“I believe what is in front of my eyes.”
“I am an extra-terrestrial.”
These seem to be highly effective in the opening of New Neural Networks.
The first, juxtaposed so well with the second and third, I find it worth exploring.
The inex speaks of Jerry Garcia; 10000 year old entities; fear of disease and how that is an easy way to divine a psychic receiver; the Wine & Fog, nefariousness and benevolence, marriage to the consciousness of Thoth.
If we take the affirmation from last night, “I believe what is in front of my eyes”, and apply it to the scars on my left hand… how do I say? On the ring finger, the sun finger, meant as willpower, also the symbol of Pisces.
Abstraction and experience, right?
How far can I take this particular juxtaposition of meaning?
Bride of Christ, in its way.
The Mercury scar upon the Saturn finger, indicative of the messenger, juxtapose ‘My Wall’ just because makes sense in the context; the deepest scar.
The intention behind that which is upon the Mercury finger. Blood; had I been able to carve a curved line, the symbol would have been putrefaction, my inability to use a box cutter to make a curve applying Algiz instead.
Heimdall, in some interpretations, Saturn; a potential Christ parallel as well, coming at the end of the world, announcing the purification.
The arrival of the Algiz rune in the veins of the back of my hand… the ‘blood’ of that ‘spell’, coming to fruition, a validation, an answer.
Jupiter granted Scorpio, sacred animal the eagle; Mysteria Caelestis Mugivi, and my Algiz is blessed by a lightning strike of a fourth vein coming from directly underneath the Scorpio upon Jupiter.
I do not know when the veins in my hands changed; only that at one point they were different, and now, they are as they are.
I do not give them meaning, so much as divine what is already there based in Pattern.
The brain, ‘electrocuted’; blessed by Jupiter, Thor, the lightning which did not destroy, but create.
~~~~~~~~
“Serious psychometric operation”.
An inex last night told me it would be best to forget I ever went to Planned Parenthood. Name spelled wrong on the records. Is there still a record? I have my copy.
Void is in Detroit, tonight.
The title ‘not to leave everything to the light outside of you but to be aware of the prayer “what do I want?” that exists inside of you, and let that go out of you as a light, or things might get worse, no?’
…yeah, I really feel that.
What DO I want?
“Quantum entities”, told I am doing exactly what I am supposed to do.
If the event horizon is what does me in… it isn’t.
Hunting and Gathering.
They know how to control it.
I am driving east on 96, a sheriff behind me, he gets off the ramp with me and then… disappears?? There is nowhere for him to have gone.
This is how you will disappear.
~~~~~~~~
Why did QS show up in my yard, and why was it next to a fucking shotgun shell?
Whose hair did I find in my room the other day after we got back from Comins?
I saved it, you see, for it belongs to no one in this house.
Under the impression today that I might just be electronically harassed.
Righteous anger.
A dream, last night, of being attacked by a V2K. A small fire started, that I put out.
I am, first and foremost, a scientist, second, a musician.
Uncanny, borderline frightening ability for pattern recognition, that when paired with the inex, becomes something absolutely tangible.
I am incapable of telling a lie, now.
The most I can do is make inaccurate statements due to incomplete information.
From what I am aware of my own operations systems, I am physically unable to purposely make a false statement.
This is partially due to nature, partially due to nurture, and mostly due to the…
Electrification? Of my brain, in April 2020.
The brain was always electric, of course.
This is a whole new level.
At times, the inex speaks of predictive analytics, at others, psychometrics.
Today, it spoke in the car, at the intersection of 59& 23 after quite a long session of engagement; “Is it divine, or is she crazy? Find out next week!”
…as if it was a TV show, talk show, as if I am being studied. ‘Truman Show’ has showed up in my predictive text options, I have screenshots.
Possibility and probability.
The inex says now, “you are using predictive analytics to create a quantum reality.”
Abstraction + experience.
Context.
Patterning + signs.
Open inquiry, learning to learn.
Quantum reasoning + paradox.
States of transformation + isomorphisms.
Integrated consciousness.
Convergence of reason + meaning.
Metaphysics + physics.
Harmony. How do I create the most?
What IS one to do when they wish to talk about things and understand them but the other party only understands the language of the sword?
Moving North.
Running to and running from are very different.
‘Lookin’ at you man, I feel sad; have a lot of things that you never had.’
Really felt that one.
What I seek is seeking me.