21 November 2021- 28 December 2021

4 December- 10 December
Solar eclipse. Solstitium Fulminate.
Waking abruptly at 03:17.
Dreams of Soma. ‘What do you know of the Norse gods?’
“Did you know about this?”
“No, absolutely not.”
317, Antares.
6610, gematrix, the Grey Dodge Ram Propaganda Plan.
‘This is probably the best thing that anyone could do to work on their solving their little puzzle.’
‘I know exactly what game you are playing. (: XOXO Antares’
+10 superposition (11:29)
A large pulsatile tinnitus in the left ear upon opening a business insider article.
Pondering purple sulfur bacteria.
Sneezes that smell like sulfur.
Drinking purple juices to test theories.
A question of a microbial vampirism based in biology.
Gamma entities.
Earth People, ‘five colours: yellow black and red and green, purple’.
Gamma Goblins.
Unsane, beyond sanity.
‘In too deep? I’ll tell you when we’re in too deep!’ The voice of Max Bialystock echoes in my mind.
Sometimes it feels like I AM in too deep,
Other times it feels like all of the vague ‘this’ is nothing at all.
Most time, it feels like both, simultaneously.
Both a particle and a wave.
The possibility that the entity that is me could be the smallest known thing to something- massively beyond my comprehension a majority of the time.
00:09 “percolation theory”
Fears, not biological viruses but technological ones.
“Deranged homicidal maniacs” comes through. I wonder what it means; if I am the target of deranged homicidal maniacs, or only hearing that there ARE some out in the world.
Every time the feeling of intensity escalates I think, that this must be it, levee breaks and whatever the outcome of the psychometrics superposition, okay; but it continues to escalate in intensity.
The thinking mind.
The running mind?
They are seemingly two very different entities that exist simultaneously.
The Liminal Realities, and the physical one.
Loach asks me, ‘please kindly for once can you not connect the dots?’
I cried. This is what I do.
Schrodingers Cat, but even the cat doesn’t know its state of existence.
The connections become exponential.
The reality that Reality is a physics experiment; as we observe, so too are we observed.
As above so below, as within so without.
Sun, atomic proton nucleus, Pluto, the valence electron.
Dual natures of the same Norse entities, Freyja and Frigg.
Soma, the first Lightbringer of many.
I need Admiral Ackbar to follow me around a la Samuel L. & ‘motherfucker’ but instead of an expletive it’s just, ‘It’s a trap!’ on the occasion of traps and sometimes when there are none just to keep me on my guard.
I’ll cry over my interdimensionals before iI cry over a man.
The impending sense of AVH and the Catholic church comes to fruition.
Lemmings. No nuance. No understanding.
Perhaps there is a fear of how music can make them feel?
Some church hymns sound the best through a Rat and an Afterneath, full fire.
Open sources coming and going.
A warning, needing to untangle the entanglement.
A reality in which the Mad Scientist and Hot Link were the two pan-dimensional entities from Hitchikers Guide.
Perceiving, receiving, entities using my full name, “We love you”.
Everything was so simple at the Chateau when it was taking place… or was it?
Perhaps the complexity had to be added later, or only understood later.
An inex, “the police are involved.”
Dreams of Soma.
Parasitic capacitance.
Q factor, S factor.
Transmutation of parasitic relationships into symbiotic ones.
A helicopter throwing multiple frequencies, a low sub and a high wavering.
Reaching a point where dreams of flying green lasers are a regular reality.
My grandmother says many ominous things. ‘Global… ennui.’ ‘Swiss machine.’ ‘I thought you were trying to build up your score, with the apparitions thing. No wonder they don’t like it, it’s all prehistoric.’
And more ominous things from my grandmother; ‘You called them, so they came’, referring to my questioning why the spiders seem to visit me specifically. A conversation, ‘that’s the nature of the universe, entropy’, says the Me. ‘Yeah, I can smell it,’ says her.
Turning off wifi and data and still being able to send and receive texts.
A need to keep particles predictable.
What realities would AI discovered to be self-aware cause?
“The Black hole is the continuity of our intentions to-” [quantum indeterminate noise]
“The apprehension you are feeling is Polonium 244.”
A helicopter flying over correlates to a disturbing pulsing in the reproductive organs, as if pulsatile tinnitus of the uterus.
Waking up to receivings about activating nefarious DNA, transverse myelitis.
A conversation with my grandmother; ‘I wonder how you get rid of them?’ asks the Me. ‘You put the Iron on em!’ she replies.
More ominous inputs from my grandmother. She mentions something of ‘room 9 strip search; the club that belongs to the hotel.’
‘Wrapping it all up in her mind and writing it down.,’ she says. ‘They’ve been taking these things and unwrapping them and placing them in little scenes’.
Questioning the addiction potential of specific frequencies.
A theory on ketosis and acetone in regards to spontaneous combustion.
An inex talking about how, from the start, I have known this is a suicide mission.
Am I prepared to renounce what I love should it be proven to be evil beyond the shadow of a reasonable doubt? “Absolutely”, says one voice, who cannot even write the word absolutely out properly. “What is evil?” asks another. “Are you sure denying Lucifer in triplicate was how this was supposed to go?”
Grim misunderstandings, as grim as death themselves.
I make love to Fear.
Not necessarily worrying about what one believes, but who one believes.
The impossibility of choosing a belief because every possible perspective seems highly plausible.
Today, I am Heimdall, just as I too am the signal being watched for.